Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Fighting For Forever.

I feel like opening up a little...
Some days I don’t love Chris. Some days I can even say I hate him. It’s true. We aren’t full of rainbows and butterflies all the time. The truth is, we fight. We fight everyday to keep our love alive. Some days are harder than others. Some days I don’t know if I want to scream or cry. I have often considered what I’d do if it all ended. Who I’d be. What my life would be like. Who I’d end up with. But in reality it really doesn’t matter! I’m married. I chose Chris to spend the rest of my life with! I love him. I’ve always loved him. I chose him for a reason. Yeah we were young, and I’m not going to sit here and say that I don’t consider the “what ifs”, but he is my other half. We are not alone in this world, and never will be again. I will never have to hit rock bottom ever again. Now WE hit rock bottom. We’re life partners; we’ve started a family together. He’s mine and I’m his. Not just to love, but to share a life with… our life together. We have so much more than love. SO much more. Honestly, the love sometimes goes away. I’m not going to lie. It’s extremely hard when it goes, and things get rough. But no matter what, we always get it back. Always! I guess it’s because we fight. Sometimes it’s so easy to run. But how could we? Love is not just a beautiful feeling anymore, its life. It’s our family. It's what we do everyday for each other. Love is Chris supporting our family, and me keeping it together at home. We’ve done some horrible things to each other, we’ve had some epic fights, but look at us! We just keep getting back up… his hand in mine. Like I said before, it’s not me against the world anymore- it’s us. We have so many years to build our love together. Giving up just can’t be the right answer. Right now, we’re having a rocky moment, but look at us. We’re getting through it together. If I get weak, he brings me back up and vise versa. After we get through this hard time in our lives, we’ll be stronger than ever, I know it. We have so much life ahead of us. The love is still there. I love him.

Saturday, October 03, 2009