Sunday, May 31, 2009

Friday, May 29, 2009


I love taking pictures of my kids... they don't.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Dr. Sutherland

said that he will review Austin's info tomorrow and they'll call me back with the game plan... EEEK!! So nerve wrecking! I want to know what they're going!!!

Tuesday, May 26, 2009


Austin is getting so old SO FAST!
I took this today... I know I'm a few days late, but hey he's still 6 months :)

Monday, May 25, 2009

:):):):) Swag Stats

These are my Stats for this week (Swag Stidio)

{click to enlarge}
I STARTED with Statcounter on Tuesday night that's why it's so low.
If you don't know much about stats those stats are AMAZING!! I've only had this site open for like 2 weeks now! I bet soon enough I'll be a host site for AWESOME brands! I love being apart of the Momdot forum. They are so helpful!

Anyway did you see that I got the MOST visitors today?? I'm growing baby, I'm growing!

Check my Swag Studio site for great Giveaways! And don't forget to follow me! Numbers really matter on that site. Also return often to check updates :)

Special thanks to Emily and Shelbey... they helped me get my site together and running.
Emily is my graphic designer and manager
Shelbey is my editor and mind


Tonight's the first night I put Lily to bed where she didn't cry herself to sleep!! Hallelujah! I just talked to her about it before putting her down. She even gave me a goodnight kiss tonight without me having to struggle. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel!

Blog Love {Ezra}

Recently, Amy (Swag Studio) and Erin (Pour Some Sugar On Me) learned of a fellow blogger in need.
Meet Ezra.
Ezra (2), the son of Beth from, has been recently diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia. Beth is in a tight spot financially and could really use some help. As you can imagine, Beth's family's world has just done a 180 and she's not sure which way is up right now. This is how YOU can help.
Erin and Amy have come up with the Blog Love bracelet.
They are light blue (pictured below) with "Blog Love" debossed on them.
They were made with Eco friendly materials!
{we just ordered them yesterday so I'll picture the actual wrist band when it arrives}
Custom Embossed Wristbands
As a community of mothers and bloggers, we can all do our part in purchasing one of these lovely bracelets for a mere $5. All the proceeds will go directly to Beth. We are all basically a family, so come on, why not? If we all come together, imagine what we can do! It's time for mommy bloggers everywhere to roll up their sleeves and, er, click the mouse a couple of times to buy this amazing bracelet. :)
It's for a good cause... it's cute... it's BLOG LOVE!!
Seriously, let's help sweet Ezra and his family on this journey they are about to embark upon. If you decide you do not want a bracelet, or are gracious enough to want to donate a larger sum, you can donate directly into Beth's personal PayPal HERE.
Thank you all so much. Your donations will be greatly appreciated.
Amy and Erin
{Leave a comment if you are interested so we can order more if we need to. I want to get an idea of who wants one so just leave a comment on this post. When they arrive and I see that they turned out nicely, we'll start actually selling and sending out.}

Friday, May 22, 2009


I don't think Lily is ready for potty training just yet.

She doesn't seem ready and I don't want to force her into it.
So for now we'll just stick with the no pacifier and just TALK more about potty training.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Lily's a Big Girl Now!

A couple things have been going on with miss Lily bug and I couldn’t be prouder!

First off tonight is the 3rd night Lily has gone to bed with… drum roll please… NO PACIFIER!!! Yes… you hear it here first ladies and gentlemen! She is done with that horrendous addiction! Lily still cries when she goes to bed, but I think every night now she’s starting to know that no matter how hard she cries it’s not going to happen. It’s nice that Chris is gone so I don’t have to worry about keeping him up! Anyway it only took 2 years and 4 months but she has finally overcome her addiction!

Secondly, today Lily started wearing Big Girl Panties! Nat knew this girl who potty trained her kid in no time, because she just switch her kid over cold turkey (besides nights of course). I mean yeah you have to clean up, but Lily is not going to like the feeling when she pees in her panties… it’s not absorbent like her diapers. Lily couldn’t be more thrilled to be in panties… especially since they are DORA panties. She loves telling me that :)
Anyway funny thing, Lily sat on her toilet for the majority of the day and NOT ONCE peed or pooed! So she didn’t get any training at all! She just held it in all day. Oh well we’ll try again tomorrow! She’s going to have to go sooner or later!

Stellan's Story

Watch video here.

WARNING- It will make you cry!

Sometimes I need to remember that I'm not the only one.

Watching the video was as far as I could go though... it was just a little too much for me. I'm not mentally ready to read her blog or this story yet... even if it's full of miracles. I just can't.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

My beautiful walls... RUINED

Right before Chris left to Kuwait, I got him to paint the walls in our family room.  They were the most hideous colors and I could not stand them for the whole time he’ll be gone.  Right before Austin was born, I finally talked him into it.  Chris was so proud of those walls.  He didn’t even want me to hang anything up, because it would ruin his perfect masterpiece lol!  It was HIS ART!
Well I guess he wasn’t the only one who thought the walls were for art!  Today I caught my daughter, Lily, adding to Chris’s “masterpiece.”  She got in so much trouble!  She had gotten the stepstool from out of the bathroom, took it into the kitchen, got the pen out of our junk chore, and went at it! 

That girl is so… TWO!

Oh I wish!

I wish I were as smart, talented, and witty as my sister, Emily!  She is one brilliant girl!  And she's so creative and clever!  I wish my blog was half as awesome as hers!

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Happy Armed Forces Day!

I just so happen to be a VERY PROUD Army Wife. My hubby is in Kuwait right now and I'm missing him like CRAZY!
But I completely support the military and He's my hero!
I just want to thank ALL the soldiers out there no matter what branch of the military you are in!
Also I want to give a shout out to their wives, fiances, girlfriends, etc.

YOU GUYS ARE SO STRONG AND AMAZING! Today is to celebrate YOU too!
Like this design?  Go visit my Sister Shop!

If you would like to send Chris a letter/ thank you note...

Wednesday, May 13, 2009


My babies are my life. I love them so much more than you could ever know. They make me smile and attack their faces with kisses many times a day. I just can’t get enough of them! I wish they could both stay young forever… or atleast until I’m ready for them to get older :)

This army life of mine.

You know, people say that being an army wife must suck, and they couldn’t handle it. Well the truth is, even though I haven’t had to experience it much yet, being an army wife is tough. Your husband is gone a lot of the time; you have to be strong for him, yourself, and your kids. I’m not going to lie and say that it is easy. But the thing about the army is… it’s not a job. Yes, that’s where we get our income, but it just doesn’t seem like a job to me. It’s more like a lifestyle. We’re in one big exclusive club. It doesn’t matter where I am; if I meet an army wife at random we already have a million things to talk about. All these wives come together and support one another. It’s actually pretty amazing. I’m so glad Chris and I decided to enter the army… we would have never known otherwise that this awesome world exists. I mean I can have friends who range from 17 to 60 or even older, because we have our lifestyle in common. Yes, some have had it harder than others, but those who have it rough help the newbies like me get through it. We all are holding hands in this. Chris and I used to try to get people to join so we could get a pay bonus, but we decided it’s not worth it. Yeah we get a couple thousand for talking this guy into joining, but then we have this guy in our group that doesn’t want to be there. That’s the worst kind of soldier if you ask me. But anyway I’m getting off point. I know you guys feel bad that I’m all alone here with two kids for a long time and yes, it will be hard, and at time to time I will have to vent, but in the end this is what I want. And really I’m not alone, if I need to talk I have all my friends from ait, Belgium, and here to help me out. With a little help from my fellow army wives I can do this. I’m so proud of my husband for sacrificing so much to provide for our family and I want him to know how much I love him. I am so happy that he is in my life and I am so happy that we are in the U.S. Army. We plan on retiring so this won’t be our last deployment… it’s just training for the future, longer deployments. Anyway enough rambling on. Just know that I am a proud army wife and I love our country.

I'm not sure

... but I think Austin is starting to get little freckles on his face. Like right under his eyes. But you never know.

Also I want to start doing a fitness video... does anyone have and suggestions? I want to mainly workout my stomach, love handles, and thighs.

I'm so mad at myself! I just did a large load of laundry and forgot to put detergent in! Gotta do that one again... lame. Sometime I'm so out of it!


Time is so different without Chris here. Everyday is the same, there are no weekends. Like today I couldn’t figure out what day it was, but then I remembered I had gymnastics yesterday so it must be Wednesday. I used to wake up around 9 and wait till 5… when Chris gets home. Then on weekends I could sleep in and relax. Now everyday is a weekday… and a weekend. I mean it’s a weekday, but no matter what day it is I still have the same responsibilities. It’s a weekend, because I really don’t have deadlines anymore. The kids and I can take a whole day to just relax if we want. Time is just different. Yesterday we were tired and we all took naps. I woke up at 6:00 and I thought to myself that Chris would have been home an hour ago. It seems like time is… slower now. Instead of trying to get the whole house clean daily I’ve started doing one thing a day. On Monday I gathered and picked up all the trash in the house and took it outside, yesterday I did nothing but played with my kids and napped, and today I plan to do all the laundry in the house. It’s just weird now. I know I’ll get used to it and when Chris gets home it will be weird doing the 5 o’clock thing again. But I’m just trying to adjust for now.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

The Bug

Okay guys I have to tell you this, because it was seriously horrifying. I’m still freaking out! Early while I was making dinner I heard Lily start squealing and laughing and since Austin was in there with her I knew she was up to no good. So I went and checked on them and found my precious, adorable little girl PLAYING with a bug. This wasn’t a normal bug… it looked like an ant but like 100 times bigger. IT WAS HUGE! Now you need to know something about me… I’m extremely afraid of bugs. Not like the normal girl… I’m terrified of them. I think I have a serious phobia. So my body completely tensed up and I just reacted. I grabbed Lily and threw her on the couch, got a piece of trash and threw it on him, put a huge book on top of that, got my shoes on and jumped all over the book. Yes, I had to have three layers between me and the bug I was killing. So I jump for a good while, because I DO NOT want this horrendous bug to survive and then I take the book off. I go to pick up the piece of trash, but my body got this weird feeling of disgust and I couldn’t do it. I just let the trash sit there. I got Lily’s plate ready for dinner, sat her down, and then went back to the crime scene. I had to do it. If I didn’t Lily would and I couldn’t let that happen. So I got up the nerve and just picked it up really fast. There is was. The bug just sitting there, and then all the sudden it starting walking around again! IT WAS A BEAST! So I freaked out and covered it again jumped even harder, and longer. There was no way that think could still be alive. So I got the nerve to check and that giant thing was still at it. I decided enough was enough so I got the secret weapon out… RAID! I was not going to lose this war! So there I was against this terrible creature and I was losing. It was time to turn things around so I shot him upside the head with like the whole can of raid. He could swim in it… you know… if he lived that long. So I sprayed and sprayed and that monster kept on going. He wasn’t about to give up. He was slowing down and I kept raiding his butt up. Finally he stopped and crawled into a ball and just sat there in agony. I kind of felt bad for the little guy. But he moved and moved for probably 10 minutes. Then I just had this weird fear that he was going to get up and run onto me so I just attacked him one last time with more raid than ever and he went. I hope he went somewhere peaceful, because he died one miserable death. But hey if he didn’t try to be so freaking strong maybe his death would have been a little nicer. Anyway that’s why I need Chris here. I don’t do bugs. I can’t handle them. They’re too scary. There’s my story… enjoy.

Last Of Project 365 2009

These are out of order... I don't want to think about dates :)
Earth day 2009
Lily showing me her shirt

eating ice cream on a hot day
5 Months!
First time drinking a bottle... threw up that whole night
Kenzie came over to play :)
Natalie babysat the kids and Austin had a diaper incident.  So she put Lily's shirt on him

Playing in the GA rain- pics by dad
Lily fell asleep while eating dinner- pic by dad

I told her we were going bye bye and she grabbed my purse

I took this one today... Austin sleeping
So sweet
Okay there's your Project 365
with most of those days missing. 
I'll still try to take pictures, but it won't be nearly as often

Lily & Kenzie

Aren't they so cute and innocent???
They wouldn't hurt a fly!
They love to play together!
Oh. Wait.
They have a love hate relationship that's for sure.
They love each other but HATE sharing!

May 2009

By natalie
{Click on picture to enlarge}

Monday, May 11, 2009

Our Lullaby

Okay guys I know I’ve been blogging too much lately, but I just have to share this. Plus like all my other posts I want to read about this in the future.

For the first time ever tonight I hummed little Austin to sleep. He just laid on my bed snuggled up and relaxed. It was a beautiful Mother Son moment. I sang and he listened and little Austin slowly drifted off to sleep from my music. It soothed him! I hummed Once Upon A December from Anastasia. I think that song will be my Lullaby to him. I love that song and he seems to also.

Life was made for little treasured moments like these.


I went to the dentist to get some work done. I LOVED the laughing gas they gave. It was so relaxing! But the numbing is starting to wear off and my mouth is KILLING ME!!! It's all I can think about. It feel stretched out and extremely sore. I can feel where they stuck the needles in to numb it. Holy cow it's like death. I'd stop typing, but I am in great need to complain and I don't have a phone so yall are gonna get it all. I hate my teeth! It's slowing wearing off more and more as I type. I took some Advil and it just won't kick in. I can't parent right now. Lily is in her room playing with her toys, and austin is laying on the bed whining. I just want to get numb again and get some more laughing gas!!! I don't remember it being painful before. It's death!


I should have a phone on the 19th. We decided to get a land line.

First contact

I’m so happy :) :)
I got my first email from Chris today! Apparently he had to go to some kind of training, because he is in a tent at camp Buring right now so he doesn’t have the internet. He will be there for about 30 days and then he’ll go to Arifjhan. So I won’t hear from him for 30 days or so, but atleast I know he got there safe!

Sunday, May 10, 2009

My Mother's Day 2009

I’ve noticed I blog more often when Chris is gone.  I guess there’s more on my mind.  Anyway today was actually very pleasant.  Better than I expected… way better.  I can get by with a little help from my family and friends.  I got two visitors today!  Shelbey came over when I was still asleep to take me out to breakfast.  We went to IHOP and it was delicious!  She is so amazing!  Then we went over to her house.  Shannon hadn’t seen my kids in awhile and I love going over there.  It’s just so relaxing in their house.  We spent most of the time in their backyard.  IT WAS SO SUNNY TODAY!  I loved it!  Lily had a blast playing in their large backyard.  I can’t wait to have a nice big yard.  She plays on the big deck, but it’s just not the same.  Then it was time for the kids to go home for their afternoon naps.  When I got home I checked my blog and Natalie had made a really sweet blog for me.  It definitely put a smile on my face :).  Later on she surprised me with a visit.  I got to call my mom with her phone and that was nice.  Nat and me chatted up the afternoon.  Then she went home to prepare dinner for her family.  I decided to watch a movie.  I really wasn’t in the mood for some cartoon Disney movie, but I wanted Lily and Austin to watch a movie with me.  So I turned on the old movie, “Secret Garden”… worth a try right?  Well Lily seemed to love it!  She just snuggled up to me and watched the whole thing!  Austin watched it too!  They were awesome!  Lily and I also enjoyed some delicious Dove Chocolates… yes I treated myself.  All in all it was a wonderful Mother’s day.  The only downside was that I didn’t get to talk to Chris.  But hey it’s mother’s day… not wives day!  I do miss him though. 
I loved Mother’s Day 2009! 
P.S.- Where in the world has Emily gone? 

For Mother's Day

I don't think I want presents. Presents are for bithdays, christmas, etc.
All i want for Mother's day is a clean house, breakfast in bed, a homemade card, and LOTS of loves.

in the end it's more work than just buying me a gift

I Love You Mom

I’m going to be like Natalie and list some reasons my mom is and always will be my hero.
Since she has been my mom for 20 years I wrote 20 things I love about her.
My list was way too long before.

She is my BIGGEST fan and my best friend.
She is always bringing me up telling me that I’m talented, witty, and fun. She is always there for me when I need to vent or just cry. She doesn’t judge me and she is always there to help (unless the missionaries are around).
She stuck by me through some pretty rough years full of emotions.
When I used to not wake up for school she would pick me up and PUT me in the shower in the morning and feed me breakfast… and she would drive (or walk) me to school when I missed the bus.
Like Natalie said… She got me through school {well almost :)} she read me books and helped write book reports, she did homework for me, she helped me study, she pretty much did school for me.
She didn’t yell at me when I ran away.
She did EVERYTHING around the house… even the man jobs (fixing the mailbox, driveway, shower, mowing the lawn, etc.)
She was the BEST cook ever! And she cooked almost every night.
She forced us to have dinner as a family.
She always made holidays special. She made us look forward to them!
She let me snuggle with her… even now I can go lie in her bed and snuggle up to her!
She made me afternoon snacks.
She made my birthdays really special. Made mt favorite meals, did my housework, took me out to lunch, etc.
She didn’t make me get a job in High School so I could enjoy it.
She is the best shopper out there… especially when it comes to travel.
She made my older sister’s play with me.
She helped me decorate my room how I wanted it.
She loves other so much and would give anyone the shirt off her back. She does more service than anyone I know.
She has helped out of financial issues many times.
Whenever I got a dollar she’d take me to dollar tree to spend it.
Also I'd like to give a couple "shout outs"

Shelbey is the most amazing person ever. She just showed up at my house this morning and took The kids and me out to breakfast for Mother's Day. She is always thinking of me and I don't deserve her as a best friend.

Natalie is such a great sister! I loved this post! She such a sweet girl and i love her! I'm sorry i wasn't home when she stopped by.
And as for me.
It's Mother's Day and I'm going to eat some Dove chocolates with Lily.

Happy Mothers Day Amy!

Hey Everyone.  This is Amys older sister (Natalie).  I decided to take over Amys blog today.

Amy is an incredible mom and I just wanted to make sure she knew it.  She loves her kids so much.  She trys her best to make sure they have a great life.  She read book all the time to Lily.  She takes her to gymnastics, she takes Austin to all his appointments.  She plays and plays with the kids.  She takes lots of pictures so the Lily and Austin will have memories.  She is going to be a single mom for the next few months and I think that is one of the hardest things anyone can do.  She takes the kids to the park, she is trying to teach Lily everything she needs to know.  She will let my kids come over to play so that the cousins can become good friends.  She always puts her kids first and I think that is amazing!

Here are a few pictures of Amy being a mom...
Pregnant with Lily
Giving baby Lily kisses
Pregnant with Austin
Watching over Austin in the ICU

Saturday, May 09, 2009

"Daddy outside?"

My heart just broke into a billion pieces. I was sitting on the bed playing with Aus and Bug and Lily was pointing out our eyes, ears, nose, etc. Then she did all of our hair. She said, “mommy, Daddy, Austin”… she did herself when she said Daddy. Then she look at me and kept saying daddy and looking around. Then she said, “Daddy outside?” and repeated that while looking out the window. She was looking for him and she thinks he’s coming back soon. She’s going to miss him so much. Austin won’t even remember him. All the sudden I feel like crap.

Today is done.

First day without Chris and I am exhausted! Lily walks all over me and only listens to her daddy, but that HAS to change. If I can’t get her to listen to me this will be a LONG deployment. I’m trying to get this house clean, and TRY to keep it clean. Today I cleaned the main floor (except Lily’s room). I’m about to put Lily to bed, get a nice bottle of cold water, pop me some kettle corn, and turn on a movie. I need to relax! I know I’ll get into a routine and days will start to seem shorter and easier, but today just seemed long and vigorous. Maybe I’ll skip the movie and just go to sleep.

Btw, Project 365 is over… I know I didn’t make it. I’m just too busy this year. I’ll still try to take daily pictures for fun when I find the time, but no more of this daily task added to my work load.

I don’t know how moms do it! I swear all mom are on meth or something! There are these moms who have VERY smart kids, because they spend the day teaching them, their house is always spotless, they have their kids in every extra curricular activity out there where they volunteer to be the driver, and they go on all the field trips, are the school room mom, and still seem to have time to go to the movies or relax.

How do those people survive? I have a hard time chasing after my two year old and giving my son enough attention. I try, but I’m not very good at maintaining a clean house, I only have Lily in gymnastics and that seems like a lot, and I always feel overwhelmed with the million billion appointments I have every week. I try to teach Lily thing ALL THE TIME and she just can’t grasp anything I teach her. To top it off it’s almost time to start potty training!
-how will I be when my kids are in school??

Maybe I’m not the mom I thought I’d be.

{what's with these long posts?! I'm just extra emotional right now.}

why me??

Why can’t I freaking drive better??? I feel like SUCH an idiot. Last night I took Chris up to Ft. McPherson to leave on his deployment, and by time EVERYONE was getting there I decided that it would be best if I go. He was busy and I was getting really tired. Well a few minutes prior a big moving truck moved right behind my car to gather all the soldier’s equipment. And there was a truck parked right next to me. Well the thing I hate MOST about driving is backing up when I don’t have much room. I’m terrible at it. So as I started backing up I was filled with anxiety and had to stop the car. I jumped out and asked Chris to please back it out for me. He said I’d be fine and that he would stand behind me and direct me out. So I started back up and the anxiety got me and I turned a little sharp. So I was in a weird position to back out. Well Chris kept having to direct me out. He kept telling me to go back more, but the big truck was RIGHT THERE and I really didn’t want to hit it! I was pretty much freaking out. So I was complaing out thew window and he was trying to tell me what to do. Then I almost hit the truck. He told me to turn me wheel all the way and just back out and I’d be fine. I did it and I was fine. BUT because I was moving all jerky, and he was out there telling me what to do, all his friends were like laughing at me. This one guy him this disappointed face like, “Wow you married an idiot.” I felt terrible. I just drove away and then broke down. That was the last thing Chris saw me do… act like a dumb woman driver. I know I embarrassed him. I don’t know why he couldn’t have just backed out for me! I can’t believe I won’t see Chris for the next 3 to 6 months (depending on the surgeries) and the last thing he saw me do was make a complete fool out of myself… and HIM! I feel awful. I wish I could call him right now. I hate this so much. Why couldn’t we just have had an emotional loving goodbye full of hugs and kisses? We could whisper some sweet words of love and I’d be on my way. Why did I have to leave tired, moody, and so freaking out of it!

Uhh I want him home now. I want to start yesterday over.

Friday, May 08, 2009

so little time

Okay sorry I didn’t update sooner, but things have been crazy here.  Well his cath went great.  He didn’t even have to stay over night.  The doctor told us that he may look like a normal boy and act like a normal boy, but his insides are all jumbled up.  He said that the surgery is from 1 to 10, closer to 10 on the complicated and severe side.  So we can decide to do the surgeries, but he will be in out and out of hospitals getting surgeries for the rest of his life and because it’s so complicated in the end they may hit a dead end and be right where they started. OR we could just leave it and although he will turn blue when he’s older he’ll probably live to be 40 or maybe even 50.  Regardless of what we do his life span isn’t going to be as long as ours.  He’ll probably get to 60 tops. 
I just wish I could just go in the future and ask him what HE WANTS!  I don’t want to make this decision for him.  He can either spend his life in and out of hospitals regularly getting surgeries in hopes of living a little longer and postponing the blue, or he can live a semi normal life, but turn blue and die young… and only have to do cath’s every like 6 months.
I asked if we could wait a few years, but he said the window of the most successful operation is pretty much the next year or two.  So Chris and I HAVE to make this choice for him.  It’s just so hard.  I wasn’t prepared for this.  The doctor said that no matter what Austin is going to have to deal with this heart problem the rest of his life.  And his life won’t be normal.
I just need an answer.
Also Chris IS leaving tonight.  I’m going to miss him so so so so so so much.  How will I sleep without my teddy bear??  This will be hard on me… no doubt.  But I’ve been preparing myself for awhile now.  I can’t say I’m not going to break down when he’s actually gone, but at this very moment I feel ready. 
I’m just going to focus on the positive things about him leaving.
More pay
I can watch TV at night
The house doesn’t HAVE to be clean all the time
We can talk on the phone daily
We both have webcams
Well that’s all I can think of momentarily.
Anyway I want him to get home from work right now so we can spend our last night together!
(didn't edit)

Also since we can waive the termination fees with Chris’s orders, we are getting rid of our terrible phones!  So if you try to call us… sorry.  If you need anything send us at email ( or leave a comment on here. 
I’ll get a new phone soon and I’ll let yall know when I do! 

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

heart catheterization

Austin is getting his cath done tomorrow. And Chris is leaving on thursday, friday, or saturday.
Sorry I haven't updated.


What is a cath?? Click here.