I just don’t understand death… especially of a child. Maybe if the parents were awful and God wanted to give the kid peace, but this is just unbearable. I’m not me anymore, a huge part of me is dead now. I just do the steps to survive, but it’s so difficult knowing that not that long ago Austin was here. I could touch him, laugh with him, he could wear the clothes I went through today. I don’t want to get over this, I want him back. What can I do to get him back??