Sunday, May 22, 2016

Dreaming about my lost boy.

I had an Austin dream last night.  I don't remember much of it, I just remember looking for him in a panic.  I wasn't sure why I was panicking but I had to make sure he stayed with us.  I can't remember seeing him in my dream, but I vaguely remember he was with us earlier on in the dream.  Anyway while I was sleeping, he was still alive and I have no recollection of him passing away.  So it was so odd waking up this morning.  I very much remember my mind shifting from asleep frantically looking for him and coming to the realization that he's gone.  I wish I was still asleep where I truly forgot he's gone.  I've been thinking about that dream off and on all day.  I just wish I could have found him before waking up.  I wish I could go back into that dream.  One day I'll be able to stop looking for real.

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